the long, drawn out process of labor

charmaine was in labor for about 15 hours. this somewhat numbing experience was broken up with a frantic rush to the emergency operating room when kepler's heart rate was down for too long and then disappeared all together (this happened around 130p). fortunately, her heart rate sprang back in the or and we averted the emergency c-section.

i would spend the rest of the twelve hours or so obsessed with kepler's heart rate monitor. labor (and, indeed, all of the pregnancy) was an amazingly helpless journey for me. luckily, the people at cpmc are wonderful at walking you through what's going on and why they're doing what they're doing.

i can still hear the heart rate monitor when i close my eyes.